Shortly after I started working at the bank about three years ago, my coworkers came up with a nickname for me. They decided to call me "the dud". Of course, I wasn't supposed to know about it. The name was a secret. People talk though, even to a dud, and so eventually I learned what everyone was calling me.
Though I much prefer tool, dud does work. It fits. I have to say, my coworkers did a fine job of picking my nickname. It hints at my complete lack of charm or personality, as well as my inability to communicate well with others.
Anyway, last night I attended my second poker tournament hosted by Mark (Debbie's brother), and boy did I feel like a dud. Steph wasn't there because she was still at work, so I pretty much found a corner and hid most of the night. I don't think I said two words to anyone, even though almost everyone there made an effort to include me in their discussions. Honestly, I don't know what my problem is. I just don't converse well with people. I'm good for listening noises and the appropriate facial expressions, but that's about it. If you're looking for opinion or insight into whatever we're discussing, it's just not likely to happen.
Besides being a dud socially, I was a dud at poker as well. I'm way out of my league with this group. I can't bluff at all. I don't have the nerves for it. Nor can I read when anyone else is bluffing, which means I end up playing overly conservative. Basically, I fold on nearly every hand until the blinds have piddled my chips away to nothing. That about sums up my playing style. I'd like to think that it's just my inexperience, but I'm starting to wonder if the same things that hold me back socially are a hindrance for me at poker.
I am king of the duds.
Well, it's time for the dud to make his line picks, even though it pains me to do it. It kicks me square in the nuts not to be able to bet on sports. I had so much fun in Vegas, even if I left down a couple of hundred. It was a blast, and I really wish I could do it every weekend.
Maybe I should reopen my gambling account.
Cin +3 over Bal- This is just a spite pick. Despite the ravens winning me a good chunk of money last week, I still despise them for exposing the donks for the frauds they are.
NO -13.5 Vs Car- Assuming that the donks, bolts, and eagles were all eliminated, the super bowl match-up I'd be most interested in watching would be the undefeated Saints going up against the undefeated colts. Yeah I know, it's a pipe dream to think either team will be undefeated going into the Super Bowl, but how cool would that be? The '72 Dolphins would be fucked.
Sd +5 at NyG- Here's where the bolts start making their comeback. Write it down. Bolts win the west.
SF -4.5 Vs Ten- Fuck if i know.
These last two picks are the ones I'd put money on. Not only that, but I'd parlay them and drop two bills on it. Easy money.
Phi -3 Vs Dallas-
Pit -3 at Den-
I've got blue balls for sportsbooking.
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The fact that everyone seems to be picking Philly only confirms it in my mind that they'll choke. Just like in Oakland.
ReplyDeleteAs for this dud business, if only your coworkers could read DoL, they'd realize they were dealing with a mind that runs much deeper than their own. In fact, I think they would tremble and be very very afraid.
It hurts my feelings that they nicknamed you that. They don't know you :(
ReplyDeleteI don't think you're a dud, I think you're a STUD ;-)
ReplyDeleteI mean.. uhh... Beer and stuff. But seriously. Just because you're more introverted than extroverted doesn't make you a dud. We all still love our Tool. And FYI, that is a term of endearment.
Thanks again for the awesome Ttamson Collage. It hangs in front of my bed so I can go to sleep and dream of my adventures---Which of course by my adventures I mean Tam's adventures. ::Sigh:: If only they were really mine.....